Kissing Contract

Unless you live under a rock (or large bush if you are a fraggle), you have been subjected to infidelity plaguing our society. I do not enough energy to even begin to explain the many disturbances of the website ashleymadison.com, which is created exclusively for married people to seek out an affair with a stranger. (Did I mention their slogan is "life is short, have an affair"? I'm going to vomit.)It is naive to think that you are invincible to having your heart or emotions stray from your marriage if you are not careful.

That is why Jordan and I created our Kissing Contract last night.

(Ok, really the only reason we "created" it was because it came up in one of our many random conversations). But still, it is official now.

The Kissing Contract

If the circumstance arises in which a kiss is offered and/or accepted by one of the following female celebrities:

Olympic Skier Lindsey Vonn

Anne Hathaway

Then Jordan is allowed to grant them one closed-mouth 3 second (or shorter) kiss without receiving repercussions from his spouse or conscious.

If the indentical circumstance were to arise for one Sonja to kiss the following male celebrities:

Ewan McGregor

Conan O'Brien

Then she too could participate in a 3 second closed mouth kiss (with assistance from a step stool for kissing Mr. O'Brien) without consequences from spouse or conscious.

Other than the aforementioned celebrities, Jordan and Sonja will not kiss anyone else outside their marriage.

Just gotta go get this baby notarized and we're good to go!

...so who is on YOUR kissing contract?

While watching the Olympics....

I've learned some things...

1)I'm a bad person.

No, really. I am. Here I am watching the world's most trained and talented athletes- people who have sacrificed so much of their lives for their sport- and all I do is sit on my couch and secretly chant, "Fall! Fall! Fall! Fall!" It's not because I'm 100% evil- I just want the people that I like to win. And unfortunately, that usually requires the other athletes to fall and shatter their dreams. But I'm ok with that.

2) I do not like Russia.

No matter who you are, if you are a Russian athlete you are on my "oh, please do fall" list. I blame this on the following people:

Svetlana "Ostrich neck/fish lips" Khorkina

Plushenko (eat silver, buddy!)

...and that 2002 Russian skating scandal (too lazy to find the pictures).

3) Shaun White reminds me of a certain puppet...
Am I the only one who sees this?

brief update before class.

You know what it hard to do? Blog when you are busy. Especially when your laptop is PMSing.

Right now I have a half hour break before class so I thought I would dust off the ol' blog and update everyone on our lives.

Life is busy! I started my internship and school, which leads to 42 hour weeks of work altogether (and yes, I'm aware that lots of people work more than that, but I'm still tired by it. That also does not include the time I waste, er I mean dedicate to homework. Waaa, waaa, waaa.

Jordan officially decided that he wanted to go to OU-Tulsa. It's so nice to know where we are going...or I guess not going, since we don't have to move. Some nights it really sinks in that I will be this far away from my family for two more years and I get mopey, but overall, I am happy to stay in Tulsa.

We have 1:00 pm church and I LOVE it! I think I am the only person in the ward who is giddy about the time change. I'm sorry, but no good comes from 9:00 AM church.

Jordan and I saw "Valentines Day" and it dumber than dumb. My co-worker told me that Julia Roberts (puke) was paid 5 million for the movie....and she is in it for approximately 15 minutes. I'm too lazy to do the math, but I'm pretty sure that is around $333,333 per minute.

Annnnnd, I gotta go to class. Until next time, blog!

One fantaaaaaastic week!

I think I cam summarize how our week went with this single clip art:
Full of frightened white people.

Kidding! It was GREAT! We had so many wonderful blessings and cool things happen this week. Take, for example:

1) On Monday, Jordan found out that he got accepted into Pacific University's PA program. He had interviewed with them less than 48 hours earlier. That school is close to Portland, OR,which also means that it is close to my sister and relatively close to my Washington family. We were so happy to know that we were going SOMEWHERE for school and that this long grueling process wasn't all for nothing. (The ONLY downside of this school is that it is a private university that costs an arm and a leg, and most likely a couple of internal organs).

2) On Wednesday, Jordan received a phone call from OU-Tulsa, stating that he was accepted to their program! We were incredibly excited about this, because with their tuition, we would be able to keep our extremities and organs to ourselves! Jordan was very impressed with the staff and students at OU-Tulsa during his interview so he was happy to be a part of their program. This is also great because now we do not have to move anywhere, we get to stay close to Jordan's family for a couple more years, and we might be able to go on all the trips that we have been planning in our heads, such as Branson and New Orleans (That means you, Brittany!:D) I am a little sad to still have to live so far away from my family, but I figured with the all the tuition money we were saving, I would be able to visit my family more often.

3) We got Freckles frozen custard- best. frozen. custard. EVER.

4) On Thursday, the governor of Oklahoma issued a warning due to a blizzard that was coming up. All the schools closedwhich gave Jordan a whole day off of work and and school. As my niece Erica would say, "Ooh, lucky you!"

5) On Thursday night, Jordan and I went along with our friends to see Avatar in 3D at the Imax. I think I was the only person in the country who really didn't want to see this movie, but I am glad that I did! It was really cool- totally entertaining! I want to be a blue person!

6) On Friday, my agency that I am doing my internship at closed due to the weather, which granted me a three day weekend! Jordan only had to work a half shift on Friday too.

7) Last night, we went over to our friends' house and played the most intense game of catch phrase ever! It was crazy fun!

8) This moring when I woke up thinking it was Sunday...and then realized it was SATURDAY! Boo-Yeah! That is the best way to start off the day!

9) Jordan promised that he will play Trouble with me this morning (I've been whining about playing this game for a loooong time!)

So this sums up our awesome week!

Happy Belated Birthday Elaine!

The last few days have been crazy busy. So busy, in fact, that I was unable to write a blog entry for my mother-in-law on her birthday. Better late than never, eh?

Elaine Hintze: Mom, Mother-in-law, RN, and ex-hippi.
See?
(Look at that DRESS!!!)


You always hear that stereotype of mother-in-laws who are a pain in the neck, but Elaine is the complete opposite. She is so loving, happy, selfless, generous, and goofy!

She never hesitates to help anyone she knows. She has welcomed me into her family 100%. We have a ton together. She has taken me to movies, lunch dates, manicures, and holiday bizarre. With my real mom living so far away, it has been nice to have a maternal someone near by.

Happy Late Birthday, Elaine!!!

January 15: Crap Day

So you know those days at are just down right craptacular? That would be yesterday. Here's how it panned out:

It alllllll started around midnight when we heard someone's car alarm go off in our complex. It wasn't our alarm (I'm not even sure if we have one, and if we do, it ain't doing its job.), so we threw our pillows over our heads and murmured, "When will they turn off their alarrrrrm? People are trying to SLEEP!"

Fast forward to 11 AM. Jordan had an interview for OU-Oklahoma City (about a two hour drive for those who aren't familiar with Oklahoma geography). I decided to go with him so we could hit up the temple that was near by. We hopped in the car and start driving, thinking we had plenty of time. Part way there, Jordan asked me to enter the address of the school into our beloved GPS. I looked around the car and realized it wasn't there....and neither was my beloved iPod- both things that were used in the car the night before. That's when we realized that we were robbed! D'OH! Of course I was mad at the jerk(s) who took our stuff, but I couldn't help but be mad at myself so for many stupid things. I was mad that I left my stuff in the car, mad that I didn't hide it better, mad that I didn't triple check to make sure my doors were locked (like I usually do!), and lastly, mad that I grumpily stayed in bed while someone's car alarm was practically shouting at me, "YOUR STUFF IS GETTING KIDNAPPED!" Grrrr.

Well, we had to turn around and head back to our apartment to get mapquest directions. Thankfully we weren't toooo far away, but we had to hustle to make up for lost time. Nothing makes you feel better than anxiously driving to a school interview, hoping you'll make it in time (spoiler alert: we did. PHEW!)

Fast forward to driving to OKC- for real this time. Our pike pass* (*white plastic page thingy that lets you go through toll booths without paying) was suspended (or something) so we had to cough up ten bucks to pay to use the highways. I HATE the toll booths here. Oh, and we also almost got side swiped by a speeding semi. Thank goodness for Jordan's sweet driving on the curb skills.

Fast forward to Jordan's PA school interview. It was pretty strange. The school didn't have any tours or "Welcome to our program" or anything! Jordan showed up, got pushed into a room with three people, and started getting questioned. The interviewers asked the weirdest questions, such as, "What does your WIFE think about you wanting to be a PA?" "What about your parents?" "Have you talked this over with your wife?" "With your grades, I don't get why you don't want to just go to medical school...." They made it seem as though PA stood for prostitute associate. None of them seemed pleased with the profession at all, which was awkward for someone who is trying to convince them that he'll be great at it. They were all very stern and would not reguard Jordan's answers. The whole process was very uncomfortable and Jordan was glad to get out of the room. He had a feeling that two of the interviewers already made up their minds that they didn't like Jordan before the interview even started. SHEESH! Whatever. It's over and that is that.

Meanwhile, I was stuck in our car in the parkinglot. My origional plan was to go to the mall while Jordan was interviewing, but with no GPS, I had no clue where anything was in the city. That's ok, I'll just listen to my ipod- oh, wait. Luckily, I had my mom on the phone to keep me company and let me complain to her about how much I hate thieves.

After the horrific morning, scary drive, and painful interview, we thought a trip to the temple would be very thereputic. Good thing we have a GPS to tell where it is- oh, wait...no, we don't. We got lost. Verrrrrry lost. So lost that we just started laughing from delirious frustration. We strolled and realized that we were dang late for their earlier session and their next one was in about two hours. Double D'oh. We sat in the waiting room and strummed through church magazines. Finally, we decided to drive around and find something to do to waste our chunk of time. Walmart never looked so exciting when we found it....

Fast forward to 5:30- temple time! It was nice to relax and try to take our minds off the pain that was January 15, but I got a gentle reminder that it was Crap Day before leaving the temple.When I came out of dressing room after the session, a temple worker politely told me that the youth from the baptism trip aren't allowed in that part of the temple....meaning me and my apprent 12 year old self. Thanks, lady; and Happy Crap Day to you too!

We were very happy to get home and very very happy to be done with that day! There was a bunch of other odd, stupid things that happened too, but this post is long enough.

Happy Birthday Andy!

Even though I am waaaaaay behind in my blogging (I still have three trips and two interviews to blog about! GAH!), I am going to set those aside so I can wish my brother Andy a happy 32nd birthday (*cough* GRANDPA *cough*)

This is Andy:
And no, he is not a used car salesmen- he's an uber-smart chronic student! With Andy being the oldest in our family, he was the first to venture off into school....yet he'll be the last to be completely done. That's because he:

1) earned a B.S. in Exercise Science
2) and another B.A. in German
3)and then an M.S. in Excercise Science
4) and now he'scurrently in med school AND
5)he's currently fnishing up an MPH!

I'm probably forgetting another two or three degrees in his vast collection. I blame this on his excessive amount of Asian friends he acquired during his developmental years:

(Andy is the one on the right- y'know...the only white one)

Eventually Andy will become an awesome and well rounded doctor. But that's not all!!:

* He's hilarious! He's always cracking us up.
* He's great dad to his adorable three kiddos.
* He's athletic- not only does he love to run and play volleyball, he even taught those classes at BYU.
* He's a talented guitarist.
* He's wise- There have been any times when I called Andy when I was confused about going to BYU, dating some dork, whether or not to marry some Oklahoman, etc. He's always been helpful.

I feel so grateful to be the youngest of my family with my awesome siblings! And I am grateful to Andy for being the oldest and being an example to us all. Happy Birthday!!

Sharing Time With Jordan

You know how three year olds struggle with sharing? Well, so do 26 year olds.

Tonight Jordan and I split a meal from Pei Wei and took it home to eat. When we brought it home, this was our conversation:

Sonja: Hey, will you divide the food up?

Jordan: Uh, can you do it?

Sonja: No, I did it last time. Just do it.

Jordan: But if I do it, I won't be fair!

Haha. Excuse me? At least he's honest. Fast forward two minutes later (after I convinced Jordan that he is capable of selflessly splitting up dan dan noodles)

Jordan: Hey, will you come and see if this is even?

Sonja: No, you can do it without my help You're 26.

Jordan: Yeah, but I'm also weak!

Fast forward one minute after Jordan declared that he split the food up. I came up to the table and picked one of the halves (the one in the cool Pei Wei container, to be specific). This lead to:


Jordan: Noooo!

Sonja:What?

Jordan: That one has more!

Sonja: You were supposed to make them even!

Jordan: Well....you usually eat less than I do!

Sonja: Fine. I'll add some to your plate.

Jordan: Nooo! I wanted to eat out of the container!

Sonja: No! you had it last time!

Jordan: Hmph! Fine!

Sonja: *adds a few spoonfuls to his plate* There.

Jordan: You still have more!

Sonja: How uneven did you make this??

Jordan: I warned you about me!

So there you have it, folks. Jordan is a wonderful, caring, and thoughtful man...just not when it comes to sharing food. Consider yourselves warned.

Resolutions

Ok, so I know that Christmas hasn't even come yet, but I'm already thinking about New Years. (This oughtta give Christmas a taste of its own medicine, seeing how everyone and their step-brother says, "Ok, I know Thanksgiving hasn't even come yet, but I'm already thinking about Christmas." ANYway...) Every time January 1st comes around I make resolutions that I usually stick to until...January 18ish. But not in 2010!

You always hear people say that you need to write down your goals to make them more accountable. But since writing things on paper is so 1999, I figure posting them on my blog works is a nice modern alternative. That, and I'm lazy and I don't want to get up off the couch.

Here is the 2010 line up as of today:

1) Proofread my friggin blog entries. I don't know why I never do this. I'm a horrible typist and am completely prone to making typos, yet by the time I finish a post I never want to read over it. I'm the same with homework but pesky grades force me to proofread those. But I hate noticing typos or mess ups after my entries have been read by the entire 3 of you who read them, so I'm actually gonna buckly down and give them look-see.

2) Read scriptures daily. Jordan and I have actually been doing a good job with this one. Since our wedding, we have not missed a since day (and it's our 7 month anniversay today-holla!) However, I think it would be sweet to have an entire calendar year without missing a day.

3) Make my bed...on the weekends (gotta start small). Good gravy, how I loathe making my bed. There is something about it that is, as Mary Poppins would say, something quite attrocious. But I LOVE the look of a made bed. It makes our room look so much more pleasant and inviting.

That's it for now. I'm not even gonna put 'exercise more' anywhere near my list of resolutions because I always put it in there and never do it. You know why? Because I hate it.

I'm also not gonna put 'quit biting my nails' on my list either. That's usually #1 on my list every year and come January 1 at 4:oopm, my hands are practically nubs. I would love to quit someday, but I don't want to bad enough to yet, I guess. (Sorry Mom, I know you've been waiting for me to stop for about 20 years).

And now it is the end of my post and guess what- I soooo don't want to reread this! But hey- Loophole! I don't gotta yet- it's still 2009 so I can embrace my typos a little longer.

One year older and wiser too!

Today is the 26th birthday of my hunk-a-husband Jordan! I am so excited to be able to share the rest of Jordan's birthdays with him. There is so many things I love about him, so in honor of turning the big 2-6, here are 26 reasons why I think Jordan is the bee's knees.

1) He's a smartypants! He graduated with honors from BYU after having a full-tuition scholarship for academics.

2) He is a talented guitarist. I love being his groupy.

3) He's hilarious! Jordan is so goofy and is always giving my abs a workout from laughing so hard.

4) He happily drives everywhere we go together- even on longer road trips. (I HATE driving).

5) He is not a picky eater, which is nice as I continually try to learn how to cook.

6) He's big and strong. It's so nice to have someone around who can lift 5X the amount I can and reach twice as high as I can.

7) He knows a ton of songs. We have a blast belting out Boys II Men together in the car....or Miley Cyrus. :P

8) He is really good at making up songs on the spot- making them rhyme ad everything. They are always clever and crack me up.

9) Every time I fall asleep on the couch he carried me to bed. (I'm so spoiled)

10) He's very cuddly and affectionate. It's like having a human teddy bear.

11) He has great goals that I know he will achieve. I'm excited for him to start PA school soon.

12) He has a very powerful testimony of our Savior.

13) Even though he is a macho manly man, he still uses the words precious and adorable regularly.

14) He is SO good with kids. I love knowing he will be my baby daddy sometime.

15) He's very protective of me. I always feel safe with him.

16) He is very patient (especially with me!!)

17) He has the same taste in movies and tv shows as I do. We happily watch Seinfeld together every evening.

18) He's athletic. Jordan is good at tennis and golf (and although those are the snobby sports, he ain't no snob!)

19) He is very quick to forgive whenever I'm being a butt.

20) He is sensitive. He always feel awful if he thinks he hurt my feelings or raised his voice at me (and usually when he apologizes for raising his voice, I didn't even think there was any voice raising in the first place).

21) He's good at impressions. They are funny.

22) He's good at making a joke go on and on without it getting old...does that make sense? I dunno.

23) He is loyal. He tries hard to maintain his friendships with people from college and even high school.

24) He's thoughtful. He likes to surprise me with little things and I love it.

25) He watches musicals and chick flicks with me without complaining.

And the 26th thing I love about Jordan:

26) He promised I could get a puppy...as soon as we have a yard.

Happy Birthday, Hulk!!! You're the best and I love you!