2014

2015 sounds way too futuristic.

Looking back on the last two years has been interesting. 2013 was an amazing year! 2014 was...exhausting.

2014 was a very important year for our family; it was the year our duo became a trio. Our little J Man came into world and rocked our lives and year. I would be lying if I said, "Oh, because of him, 2014 was the best year ever!!! OXOXO," because in reality, it was hard.

I think this year could be summed up in one word: tired. Physically tired from 10 months of sleep deprivation (because the last month of pregnancy was one night of insomnia after the next). Mentally tired from constantly, and I mean CONSTANTLY worrying and second guessing parenting decisions. And bored tired of long days at home, waiting for Jordan to come back from work.

In 2014, I feel like I lost a little bit of myself. The entire year, I have felt like my body is not my own anymore. January-March, I was a whale, and from March-June, I still looked a little pregnant and was still healing. I have lost all my baby weight, but my body shape is very different and still quite squishy. I am SO grateful that I have been able to nurse my son and I do enjoy it for the most part, but it has resulted in a lot of planning around feeding and pumping. Aside from my body, I've had a lot less time to improve my talents and hobbies. I've read significantly fewer books this past year. It may sound selfish, but I struggle with this.

This was also an interesting year for our marriage. 2013 was an incredibly romantic year for us. We traveled through Europe together for our anniversary and spent a "babymoon" in NYC. We nested for our baby-to-be and had fun creating a home in our new house. 2014 was a huge adjustment for us. After being just husband and wife for nearly five years, being spouses AND co-parents was a big change. I certainly wouldn't describe it as having marital problems, but definitely marital adjustments.

And my dad was diagnosed with cancer in 2014, which sucks.

But I don't want to complain too much, as so many wonderful things happened in 2014. OBVIOUSLY, it was spectacular that Baby Jo came into our lives. He is a huge blessing and we are ridiculously in love with him. Despite our new challenge of shifting from strictly lovers to lovers who also have to agree and share the responsibility if co-parenting, I feel like we have grown closer as a couple. We have had to serve one another more often and appreciate each other more. And because our alone time and dates have significantly decreased in length and frequency, we cherish them more. Some of our best dates of 2014 included seeing the musical version of Little Mermaid, seeing Jerry Seinfeld perform, and going to the Dave Matthews Band concert. We've also been able to go out frequently to events as a family with Baby Jo.

I was also lucky to see a lot of my family this year. I saw every member of my family at least once this year, and I had a lot of family visit me. I also had my high school besties surprised me with a visit in April, and I got to travel to Vermont, Seattle, California, and Hawaii this year.

So, in review, 2014 was tough but good. I would much rather have had the year I had rather than a easy year without my baby. I'm a little nervous for what comes in 2015 (early toddlerhood....yikes), but I am also excited. Overall, I am so happy to be able to have the privilege of living one year after the next. Let's see what the next one brings...