Guest post

Hello, Baby here! And yes, I do have a laptop that I can type on in the womb, thanks for asking.

I thought I would pop in and say "Hi" to everyone since my mom keeps talking about me. Geez, does that lady have anything better to do than obsess over me, delivery, and nesting? Answer: No.

I am excited to enter the world outside of my mom's abdomen, but I'm in no hurry. I've actually been pretty successful at keeping myself entertained in here. Here are a few games I've made up:

Game #1: I call this game "Suckuh!" It's where I move, kick, punch, and roll like crazy until I hear Mom say, "Holy crap, Jordan! This kid is so wiggly. Quick- feel my stomach!" As soon I feel the pressure of Dad's hand on her stomach, I stay perfectly still for several minutes. Suckuh! They fall for it every time.

Game #2: I call it "Wake Up!" When my vessel has been sedentary for a while, it usually means my mom fell asleep. Who does she think she is, the Queen of England?! She can sleep when she's dead. So the game is played by seeing how many kicks I can do before she wakes up and turns over. Sometimes she wins and falls back asleep, but sometimes I win where I don't give up moving.

I also have been enjoying the room service..or shall I say WOMB service? Heehee....oh c'mon. That's a good joke for a baby. In the mood for chocolate cake? I just have to send some weird vibe and soon enough, I'll hear Mom say, "It's so weird- I HATE chocolate cake!" That's when I know room service will be here soon. Recently, I've been on a big chocolate kick. When chocolate is denied, I usually just demand it even more. Mom usually gives in. And like clockwork, she always says the same thing: "But I don't even LIKE chocolate all that much." That lady is so predictable. But I know baby can't live on chocolate alone, so sometimes I mix it up by asking for cold pepperoni or pretzel sticks. Hey, don't judge me. Once I'm out of the womb, I get no say in what I eat for a long time.

Anyway, I look forward to meeting most of you soon. I'm still deciding on how to make my grand entrance...break the water when my mom is shopping at Target? Start and stop contractions over and over? Try to start the party at 3 am? The possibilities are endless!

Sincerely,
Baby